God describes disrespect for parents as wicked (2 Timothy 3:1-5; Romans 1:28-32). Yet many Christians dishonor their parents through neglect, ridicule, and/or rejection. It's actually become an alarming trend. And I encourage you to read Pure in Our Own Eyes to gain more insights.
1. A common excuse for disobeying this command is "I'll honor my parents when they honor me." How do the Scriptures below speak to that attitude:
James 4:17: If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn't do it, it is sin for them.
Galatians 6:9: Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Romans 12:21: Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
When we choose to disobey any command of God, we are dishonoring God.
2. Note the emphasis of these passages:
Malachi 4:5-6: “Look, I am sending you the prophet Elijah before the great and dreadful day of the Lord arrives. 6 His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers. Otherwise I will come and strike the land with a curse.”
This Scripture is describing the ministry of John the Baptist, but the mission continues after Christ's first coming. As 2 Timothy 3:1-5 says, disrespect for parents is a sign of the end times. Malachi uses the term "the great and dreadful day of the Lord" to mean the time the wicked are judged and the godly are rewarded - i.e. Christ's Second Coming. Luke repeats this prophecy, using the term "disobedient" in place of "children."
Luke 1:17: And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous--to make ready a people prepared for the Lord."
2 Timothy 3:1-5: But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.
It might surprise you to find disrespect of parents listed with other adult sins. This is also listed as an adult sin in Romans 1:30. But this is not about adults obeying their parents in the same way a young child obeys his parents. It's about obeying God's commands to respect and honor parents. Barnes' Notes on the Bible explains it this way: "This expresses the idea that they did not show to parents that honor, respect, and attention which was due"
2. Note the emphasis of these passages:
Malachi 4:5-6: “Look, I am sending you the prophet Elijah before the great and dreadful day of the Lord arrives. 6 His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers. Otherwise I will come and strike the land with a curse.”
This Scripture is describing the ministry of John the Baptist, but the mission continues after Christ's first coming. As 2 Timothy 3:1-5 says, disrespect for parents is a sign of the end times. Malachi uses the term "the great and dreadful day of the Lord" to mean the time the wicked are judged and the godly are rewarded - i.e. Christ's Second Coming. Luke repeats this prophecy, using the term "disobedient" in place of "children."
Luke 1:17: And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous--to make ready a people prepared for the Lord."
2 Timothy 3:1-5: But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.
It might surprise you to find disrespect of parents listed with other adult sins. This is also listed as an adult sin in Romans 1:30. But this is not about adults obeying their parents in the same way a young child obeys his parents. It's about obeying God's commands to respect and honor parents. Barnes' Notes on the Bible explains it this way: "This expresses the idea that they did not show to parents that honor, respect, and attention which was due"
Matthew Poole's Commentary explains it as being "stubborn and rebellious against those that bare them."
The Greek word
for disobedience in this passage notes an unwillingness to prefer what
God prefers.
Matthew 15:3-9: Jesus replied, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition? 4 For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother’ and ‘Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death.’ 5 But you say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is ‘devoted to God,’ 6 they are not to ‘honor their father or mother’ with it. Thus you nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. 7 You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you: 8 “‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. 9 They worship me in vain; their teachings are merely human rules.’”
Note:
Children who have been physically or sexually abused by parents must
seek godly Christian counsel in handling their adult relationship with
their parents.
copyright 2017, Gail Burton Purath, BiteSizeBibleStudy.com, edited and updated in 2022
Sound advice. Much needed today when many adult children feel they know everything more than the parents and put friends above their parents and ruin their lives.
ReplyDeletei want to ask a question. Is there any scripture in the bible that describe or guides the behavior or conduct of parents towards their children.
ReplyDeleteYes, Unknown, there are several Scriptures that specifically apply to the way parents treat children and many other passages that apply to the way we treat people in general.
DeleteI have never heard a parent say that they will not obey one of these commands because their child is not worthy, but I have often heard adult children say they won't obey God's command to honor parents because their parents are not worthy.
God expects parents to do the right thing and He expects children to do the right things. It is not dependent upon what other people do.
If you are looking for Biblical commands for parents, I encourage you to google it.
Thanks and God bless you.
I want to ask something. How does dishonoring parents dishonor God? I know breaking this law alone means dishonoring God, but why does He consider it such a severe wicked sin? I want to understand more, so i can follow this command better.
ReplyDeleteHi Melvyn,
DeleteIt dishonors God because He has placed special emphasis on it in Scripture. It's the only one of the 10 Commandments that has a promise attached and that promise is repeated in the New Testament. By this, God shows us that it is a very important aspect of our faith. In Matthew 15 (quoted above), He says that people who think they can serve God while neglecting their parents are not serving Him at all.
God calls Himself a Father, and part of learning respect for God the Father is learning respect for our earthly father and mother. Our parents are the first authority in our lives and learning to respect authority is part of learning to respect God's authority.
Many elements of being a child are reflections and symbols of being a child of God. Obviously, God is perfect and parents are not, but God teaches us a great deal through being a child and being a parent.
Just as children are especially vulnerable when they are under their parents control, and a parent has great power to do good or harm to a child, Parents are especially vulnerable when their child is raised and adult children have great power to do good or harm to their parents. Adult children who abuse and neglect their parents are no different than parents who abuse and neglect their children. Both are evil in God's eyes. Our culture is against ungodly parents, but often promotes ungodly adult children, and this is truly the work of Satan.
Honoring our parents requires commitment, perseverance, forgiveness, and grace, things which we need in every relationship.
I believe that how we treat our parents has special meaning to God in the spiritual realm, perhaps in ways that we cannot fully understand, but it somehow reflects our willingness to serve God.
I hope this helps.
In this article, I've included a link to my archive on Honoring parents. It might help confirm these truths and answer other questions for you.
God bless you as you seek to honor God.
Gail